Lord Sheriff Sir Roscoe B. T. Reinwald of Clan Campbell, OBE, DSO, KCWP

 

Editor's Note: Originally published on December 4th, 2022.

It is with great humility and sadness that I must announce the passing of Lord Sheriff Sir Roscoe Bumpee Thumperton Reinwald of Clan Campbell, Colonel-in-Chief of the War Poodles Own Regiment of Foote,  OBE, DSO KCWP. A very few knew his secret identity; the international troubleshooter and crimefighter known only as Danger Dog.

Sir Roscoe getting ready to cheer an Alabama Sports team to another victory.

Sir Roscoe was a miniature poodle, but there was nothing miniature about him. A loyal companion, fierce warrior and guardian of his household, Sir Roscoe never (with some rumored exceptions) failed to live up to the highest expectations of the Order of War Poodles.

Talbot's (The War Poodle's Own) Regiment of Foote Passes in Review in honor of Sir Roscoe.

Sir Roscoe's first human commented, "He was full of life and vigor and the most loving doggie you could ever have. He always had fun, blazing trails in the forest, going on trips and doing everything together with The Colonel. He was the sweetest, smartest dog ever. I loved him so much and treasured the time I had with him."

"Man of the house my fuzzy butt. Just leave your credit cards on the table next to the bed."

When Sir Roscoe joined The Colonel and his Beautiful Bride, it was evident he was no ordinary Poodle. Through his bravery and steadfast bravery, he quickly moved up the ranks protecting the household from what seemed to be an army of parentless children, delivery men, roaming packs of middle school girls on bikes, and the inevitable backing up of the red pickup truck across the street. Sir Roscoe was also the first to notice that The Colonel was losing his hearing and would announce in a manly bark whenever there was a knock on the door or if the door bell was rung.

"Turn left, now right! IT'S OKAY TO SPEED UP AND GO STRAIGHT AHEAD TO RUN THE SQUIRREL OVER!

Sir Roscoe always followed the rules, even if he was the only one who knew what the rule was (to this day some are a mystery): 

1. If there is a path, stay on the path. 

2. Never yield to a bike on the path; they have no business being in the woods and should be on bike paths on the street.

3. Never, never, never use the house as a bathroom. I would rather die of embarrassment or explode than use my house as a toilet.

4. Geese are not allowed near the house. Deal with them with extreme prejudice.

5. Those animals, even the animated ones on the big screen may jump off any moment. Soon as they are noticed, alert The Colonel or his Beautiful Bride immediately.

6. Rodents are and always will be the enemy. Don't believe in this woke nonsense and peace in our time. They are as bad as communists.

7. Tortilla Chips are the greatest food on Planet Earth.

8. The "Case of the Great Blueberry Muffin Disappearance" was solved . . . but you can't prove it.

"Did you see me eat that whole bag of tortilla chips?"

Sir Roscoe took his responsibilities very seriously, especially the training of HRH Princess Bonnabelle. He personally taught the young Royal "THE RULES" and was not shy about letting her know when she violated his personal space. In addition, if she did not clean her bowl completely at meal time, he was more than willing to help her in this arduous task.

Sir Roscoe and HRH Bonnabelle.

Sir Roscoe's finest hour came during the Battle of Sokol, when Sir Roscoe, The Colonel and HRN Bonnabelle were outnumbered and outflanked by a rogue flock of wild turkeys. When the larger General Tom of the turkeys advanced and displayed his plumage, Sir Roscoe reared up on his hind legs, bared his Danger Dog teeth and barked, "Get off our path you stupid turkeys!" General Tom promptly retreated along with the rest of the army of turkeys. In honor of the battle, Sir Roscoe always received turkey at Thanksgiving.

One of the most admirable traits of Sir Roscoe was that he never got tired of The Colonel's war stories, walking with him in the woods, drinking coffee with him, and putting up with him when he wanted to rub Sir Roscoe's belly.  In addition, he would be most insulted if he did not accompany The Colonel to the War Room when it was time to paint miniatures. There is no way to count the nights and days he accompanied The Colonel through thick and thin as he painted; they both participated in many major miniature battles. Every dog The Colonel painted was painted as a member of the Exalted Order of the War Poodles. The living members of this elite Knighthood of the Empire include Teddy, Gracie, Rory, Fido, Lucy and of course Buddy. The deceased members are Rose, Toto, Allie, Tia and now Sir Roscoe.

Approximately 2 weeks before his passing, the last official portrait of Sir Roscoe attired in his ceremonial uniform as a Knight Commander of the Order of War Poodles (GKWP).

One of Danger Dog's missions was the year he replaced Santa on a perilous December 25, but that's a story for another day.

Carry on Sir Roscoe, you have earned your rest. The Bible is vague about animals when the Lord creates the new Earth; but somehow, I think you'll be there.

Good dog.